A Word in Defense of "Illegal" Immigration

A few days ago, I was once again involved in a conversation in which I was the guy with the unpopular opinion. Go figure, right?

Someone made a comment about illegal immigrant workers, specifically those who migrate to Maryland during crab season to pick the meat from crabs for packaging, and how they bring their culture with them, and what a travesty this is. Many around the group agreed, and the commentor went on to say that in the areas where the migrant crab-pickers live, one can find more and more Mexican foods, imports, etc., and that they oughta damn-well learn English if they're gonna come here, earn their money, then head back to Mexico to live like kings.

My response to this (in my own inimitable fashion) was, "But I don't wanna pick crabs."

Simple, yes, but enough to light the bonfire of indignation. I was then told that they shouldn't be allowed to come over here, "getting all the benefits we get", if they're not even willing to learn English.

Again I stoked the flames by asking, "What are they getting that they aren't earning?"

I never got a clear answer to that question, but it did prompt a good deal of flapping and flailing. Then from the other end of the table came the statement, "It's fine if they want to do that, but they could certainly do it legally!"

I have to admit I was stunned. "Dumbfounded" might be a better word, actually. My face must have looked like a constipated Carol Channing, cuz at that point everyone got up from the table.

So why is everyone so bent about illegal immigrants? Why do we need to close our borders to people who are really only interested in making a living? Hell, Americans could learn a lot from the average Mexican work ethic. Maybe that's what pisses Americans off...they make us look like a bunch of lazy hypocrites. My money's on that one.

And what difference does it make whether they do it legally or illegally? "Legal" just means they've jumped through a bunch of hoops, dreamt up by some bureaucrat just to make it more difficult for immigrants to come earn a decent living. Sure, it means they then have to pay taxes, but it means a lot more cost to taxpayers and consumers, as well.

Putting aside the question of whether or not ANY of us should be paying taxes in the first place, I contend that it's actually better for us if illegal immigrants remain illegal.

"Blasphemy," you say! Well, here's why...

First, illegal immigrants are less of a drain on the "system" than taxpaying Americans. They're ineligible for public services (welfare, unemployment, etc.) because they're not citizens, so they're not using services they're not paying for. There are far more individuals living on someone else's dime amongst our own citizenry than amongst illegal immigrants.

Second, they're cheaper to employ because they're illegal. Employers aren't required to provide health insurance, pay payroll taxes, or make social security payments for illegal workers. They're also not bound by minimum wage laws. Granted, they're flying under the radar, but so what? This all results in lower prices for American consumers.

Third, much of the money they earn is spent here in the U.S. As noted above, the immigrants' presence creates a market for goods that otherwise wouldn't exist, benefitting businesses in areas where immigrants work. It works out all around.

If all illegal immigrants suddenly became "legal", the increased costs to taxpayers would indeed be noticeable. Suddenly they would be subject to all the same destructive rules that apply to the rest of us. If you really think about it, the protests start to sound like jealous whining, because in a way they're more free than the rest of us.